On another side, I woke up thinking so very much about this day 32 years ago when my sweet mother made her journey into motherhood. She added a another jewel to her crown.....mother! But she wasn't only a mother, she was the best mother. Do you ever wonder how God decides which child to give to each mother? However He decides, it is perfect just like everything else He does. My heart is just overflowing with thanks for God allowing me to have such a wonderful mother for almost 32 years. Yes, I would have much preferred to have my mother around for another 40 years. But I am determined to have faith in God's plan. He knew what my mother needed. She needed Heaven. She needed grace. She needed a reunion with those that she missed so much. And, God knew what we needed. We needed an angel. We needed a "come to Jesus" of sorts and that is just what my family got.
People tell you often that you should live life to the fullest and do whatever it takes to be happy. People really started telling me that after Mom was diagnosed with cancer then passed away so suddenly. But I really don't think God intended our lives to be happy all the time here on this Earth. He knew there would be heartbreak, tough times, bad things, and days where we will all question if getting out of bed is even the right move to make. All of those times bring us closer to God.....at least that's what they do to me! Honestly, there haven't been many roads to turn down the past few months. Most people would find that they've met their breaking point when their mother gets cancer and dies much too young. But, for whatever reason, God felt I could handle much more than my mom & cancer. I look back over the past 6-10 months and wonder how in the world am I even still alive. Surely, people who go through this much just give up at some point and I'm sure some people think that giving up is the way to go. I was lucky enough for the Good Lord to make me get up in the mornings so I could take care of myself and my babies. His road was the only road I could even choose.
I celebrate 32 years with best Mom. I thank God each and every chance I get that He gave me the most beautiful girl in the world that has (in my opinion) my mom's eyes, her smile and her laugh. They even share a name. So for the rest of my life I will be able to remember my Mom every single time I look at sweet Annalesa. And every time that Elijah waves at Heaven, says "Hi Nana! Hi Jesus!" and blows kisses to the sky I know that this is all a "God thing". His Nana is blowing kisses right back at him and he will always catch every one of them. And when you think about it, is there really any other excuse that would even be valid?!?
Praise God for the battles we go through. They just bring us closer to Jesus' feet. What He brings us to, He will bring us through.
Elijah's birth day
Annalesa's birth day
